How-To: Make homemade butt paste

Boudreaux's Butt PasteAs if babies don’t scream and cry enough, wait until your kid gets a bad case of diaper rash. Common among babies between 4 and 15 months, diaper rash is caused by infection with a yeast or fungus called Candida. And where does candida thrive? Where it’s warm and moist—like your baby’s diaper.

To treat diaper rash you could just go to a pharmacy and buy a jar or tube of butt paste, monkey butt, DESITIN, or A+D. Many homemade remedies include some of the former  with a bit of corn starch (an ingredient that can make a yeast diaper rash worse). The homemade butt paste I’m proposing is awesome. It’s close enough to butt paste,  costs a wee more (a 16 oz. jar of BP costs $18) and works much better.

What you need

  • Screw top jar (free, ask your pharmacist)
  • 2 oz zinc oxide ointment ($4)
  • 2 oz A+D ointment ($4)
  • 1 oz Maalox or similar antacid ($4)
  • 1 oz bacitracin ointment ($5)

Open the jar, squeeze in the ointments, add Maalox until the cream is of desired consistency, mix, label, close the jar. When your child gets diaper rash use your new homemade butt paste.

Ingredient info

Zinc oxide is used to treat and prevent diaper rash and other minor skin irritations. It works by forming a barrier on the skin to protect it from irritants and moisture.

A+D  ointment is a skin protectant. It works by moisturizing and sealing the skin, and aids in skin healing. Vitamins A, D, and E are commonly found in other products such as Neosporin and Sunburn lotion.

Maalox, and its main ingredient calcium carbonate, are typically used to treat indigestion and ulcers. It is used in this butt paste recipe because Maalox (calcium carbonate) will help eliminate you baby’s bleeding butt, and will also help neutralize the acid that is causing your baby’s butt to burn.

Bacitracin ointment is used to prevent infection in minor skin injuries. Interesting factoid, tattoo parlors recommend bacitracin as it works rapidly and does a great job in preventing infection from the tens of thousands of needle punctures involved in a single tattoo.

Important

If your baby is allergic to any of these products, or has an allergic reaction as a result, see a doctor immediately. My son used it without any complications so I’m sharing it. You don’t have to make it so don’t sue me if something goes horribly wrong.